Hair Today....Gone Tomorrow

If I do end up needing a wig, I'm getting a Dolly...

It's a truth universally acknowledged that when you move to Dubai, something happens to your hair: namely, you lose it. 

A combination of heat, humidity and harsh water means that your precious locks head down the plug hole at a staggering rate. Online forums are full of Dubai newcomers lamenting their lost locks and asking for advice, and there's a whole range of businesses devoted to restoring them. The good news is that although it's horrible whilst it lasts (around six months)  things usually even out - your hair grows back and stops falling at such an alarming rate.

If you've had a baby, you may be familiar with what I'm about to say: brace yourself, as your hair is going to fall out like never before. 

It wasn't really an issue when I was pregnant, but at 9 months post-partum and jesus wept. I'm amazed there is a single hair left on my head judging by the amount that comes out when brushing, washing, blow drying. I'm sure I could have stuffed at least two (l-shaped) sofas with it by now.

The hairdresser commented on it last month as she tried to wrestle the baby fluff I've been left with into my highlight foils. Such was the extent of said fluff that I had to go back a second time as it just wouldn't comply.

The full damage was revealed to me last week when in a store fitting-room. Of course I did the obligatory examination of my backside in the oh-so flattering mirror (never a good idea) but then my eyes were drawn upwards. I'd swept my hair up so  could get a good look at the top I was trying on, so the underside of my scalp was revealed in all its glory. In all its patchy, BALD glory. Ok, I'm not quite at the wig/hair transplant stage, but there is no denying the fact that I have lots of noticeable hair loss. 

I left the mall with a lighter wallet and heavier heart.

Is there no justice?! Is there no part of a woman's anatomy and looks that isn't ravaged by pregnancy?! (Well, if you have a c-section certain bits remain perfect...thank god.)

Did you lose your hair after having a baby? When did it slow down? Mine is now serious enough that I'm going to get my bloods checked for thyroid issues....joy! I will of course update you.....

Three Important People

Dubai Hairdressers: secret shares in Elnett?

I've always maintained there are three people a girl really needs on speed dial: gynae, dentist and hairdresser.  (I did once tell my lovely dentist this, and he wasn't impressed with being popped into the hairdresser category. I digress.)

I've found all three in Dubai with various levels of success.  I'd still fly 3, 000 miles, and do, to get my teeth cleaned and checked by this man (can you blame me?), have finally found a gynae who doesn't a) ask me why i haven't had a baby yet and b) can call my lady parts by their proper name and not 'down below.'  And up until recently, I thought I had the hair covered off. 

Regular readers and Dubai dwellers will know the major issues that blondes face in this region when trying to find a hairdresser who is used to dealing with European hair.  Who can forget this wonderful incident in my first few months here, when a visit to the most convenient salon near my apartment resulted in hair so huge it could be seen from the moon.  To this day, this remains my mum's favourite blog post.  She's a  cruel woman.

Anyway, as I say, I do have a great hairdresser. In addition to knowing what he's doing, he's an absolute hoot, with every session in the salon resulting in laugh-til-you-cry hysteria.  (Just don't introduce him to your new boyfriend, when he can become borderline offensive.  Make that actual offensive)  But recently I've caught sight of myself in photos and thought: really? Isn't that blonde just a little on the bright side?  You could say (and we often do) that living in Dubai is not a time to skimp on the blondness, and all the benefits it imparts (although a friend of mine has just gone very brunette, and looks divine.)  It's not just that.  Sometimes in all the hysteria, nay frenzy of the salon, I do feel that any requests I might have are overlooked.  And that we're too busy laughing to really pay attention to the levels of bleach that are being painted onto my head, and the chunks that are being cut out of my hair.

So I'm thinking, maybe, just maybe, it's time for a change.  When I uttered this out loud to the girls, I was met with gasps. "It's like cheating on your boyfriend!" they exclaimed. And to be fair, it's sometimes seems harder to find a good hairdresser than a boyfriend in this town.

Any fellow blondes out there with recommendations, please let me know.  I need case studies, credentials and perhaps a photo before I consider my options.  The Afghan Hound needs a grooming before my birthday.  And we all know when that is!

Legally Blonde

As every girl will tell you, there are three very important people who you must have on your speed dial list: Hairdresser, dentist and gynae. Well, I appreciate that not everyone is as obsessed with teeth as I am, but I'm sure ladies can empathise with the first two. The last time I shared this info with my dentist (hello Tarek!) he wasn't all that impressed with being lumped in with a hairdresser, but hey, it's true.

And nowhere is it more crucial to get a good hairdresser than Dubai, especially if you're blonde. And (sweeping generalisation alert, which is, to be fair, based on some hideous past experiences: see earlier blog posts) it helps if you can find someone who is used to dealing with European hair. Which means finding a European hairdresser.

I'm blessed that I have such a genius hairdresser: I give you Martin, from Scotland, who works wonders and knows that dumping a pile of bleach on your head and giving you a blow-dry so extreme it can be seen from the moon, is not a good look.

The only downside: he can talk for England. Or Scotland. And when I say talk, I mean TALK. It's completely normal for a colour and cut to take 3 hours. Yes, 3 hours! And if you don't believe me, ask Andrea, Deborah, Ellen, Kate...the list goes on.

But last night a miracle happened - I was in and out in just over an hour! There was the usual chat: the best thing that ever happened to you was losing the ex: you look amazing/what a great tan you have/I've never noticed how great your legs are/have you lost weight/let's make you blonde blonde blonde - which despite being the same every time is always nice to hear....and the results...well you'll have to wait and see, but yes, it's VERY blonde. And blunt. Cathy: I took inspiration from you....

Not only hot, but wet

There was a day last week, when I emerged from a client’s office in Abu Dhabi to a pleasant surprise – it wasn’t that hot! By ‘wasn’t that hot’ I mean it was about 38 degrees, and a very dry heat. This put me in ever such a good mood. Images of evenings spent sat outside, days at the beach (without drowning in sweat) and general outdoor fun felt just within reach. In typical ‘new to Dubai’ mode, friends and I started saying knowledgably: “We’re through the worst now, don’t know what all the fuss was about, etc etc.”

How wrong we were.

Not only has the temperature since rocketed back up to the mid-40’s, the humidity has now gone sky high. I mean 60% in the middle of the day. Not only does it make for a very sticky existence if you have to leave the house /office (I was drenched after 5 mins hanging the washing out on the balcony) but it also has a very detrimental effect on my barnet.
Remember the episode of Friends where they go to Barbados and Monica’s hair becomes so enormous it is visible from the moon….? Yes, that’s me. Hmmm mmmm I look good!