The High Cost Seas

There you are, living your life, feeling good about things. Trying to overpay on your mortgage, save cash for a rainy day, enjoying the odd splurge in the shops. I’m doing good, you say to yourself.

Then you go to Dubai International Boat Show, where a decent boat starts from…….9 million quid. And that’s just for the small ones! I’ve never been particularly interested in boats, but this event started to change my mind. Each and every one looked like it should be in a Biggy Smalls/J-Lo video, complete with girls bogling in gold bikinis.

They did let the great unwashed onto some of them for a quick look round. And they’re gorgeous. All curved edges, kitchens which you’d kill to have in your house never mind a boat, and (this tickled me the most) washing machines!

Of course, if you’re in the market for a boat, then you may also have more money than sense to rinse on other frippery, which meant that as well as boats there were toys such as what I can only describe as a ‘jet-pack hovering machine’, and lots of accessories (all gold, of course.) A very interesting window into a completely different world.

Just as I was ready to fling myself into the marina there and then wailing: “Why me! Why am I so poor!?” I was reminded of my favourite quote from the billionaire Felix Dennis.

“If it floats, flies or fornicates: rent it, don’t buy it.” Ok then. I just need to find a thousand quid to rent one for two hours……